ICC Media Statement

[Gilly Fan]

- MEDIA RELEASE -
From the International Cricket Council
For immediate release (especially in India)

The ICC have announced several changes to the playing conditions for the forthcoming 3rd test in Perth between Australia and India. These changes include:
* India must win.
* The umpires shall be nominated by the Indian team. It will be acceptable if reserve Indian players rotate as umpires.

* During the game all appeals shall be referred to the Indian management team and the Indian media contingent prior to any decision being made. (This includes where an Indian player may appear to the naked eye to have been bowled.)

* When the Indian team is batting the boundary rope shall be moved inwards 20 metres.
* Australian bowlers shall bowl under arm.
* India must win.
* Any time Ricky Ponting is on the field he shall be restrained in a full length strait jacket and muzzled.
* Any Australian spin bowler must advise the batsman in advance what type of delivery is going to be bowled.
* At any time Andrew Symons is on the field he must where a gorilla suit and accept any sledging in the light hearted manner that this is intended.

* India must win.
* Harbhajan Singh will be cleared on appeal and be nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize.
* Indian batsman may be permitted to use larger bats.
* Australian batsmen may use a bat every fifth over.
* Australian fieldsman should praise every batting attempt by the Indians by saying "Good shot chaps." Apart from this Australian players are not permitted to speak.

* During the lunch and tea break both teams shall get together and have a cup of tea.
* India must win.

The ICC and the BCCI hope that all Australians will understand these minor changes are intended in the best interest of the game.

The ICC would also like to announce that Steve Bucknor has been appointed as the ICC's new cricketing ambassador to Kazikstan. The ICC wishes Steve all the best in this important, newly created role.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Now that's what you call funny.
Not all of it, but most of it.

 

[Energizer]

Ha ha funny stuff. Although not too far from the truth

 

[SaiSrini]

I havent had such an expressionless face for a long time. You have done something unusual - kept my face expressionless for the duration of time that I read your post

Funny??? The fact that you consider it funny is FUNNY!!!

 

[mattfb]

I havent had such an expressionless face for a long time. You have done something unusual - kept my face expressionless for the duration of time that I read your post

Funny??? The fact that you consider it funny is FUNNY!!!

Are you being serious?

Ermmm... Sean wrote this in reply to the stupid "jokes" that the Indians were making and were saying were funny... Lol.

The fact that you guys consider those other jokes by the Indians is FUNNY!!! :

This one of course is better then the ones the Indians made... Not because I'm biased but because it was written in proper English and its readable.

 

[Leicester Fox]

can't take it then don't dish it out.

* Harbhajan Singh will be cleared on appeal and be nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize

 

[.::Stevo::.]

lol that was good, i like how "India must win" was repeated four times

 

[harishankar]

These are a little bit more unsubtle than the digs at Australia but still funny...

I loved this line though

The ICC would also like to announce that Steve Bucknor has been appointed as the ICC's new cricketing ambassador to Kazikstan. The ICC wishes Steve all the best in this important, newly created role.

lol that was good, i like how "India must win" was repeated four times

well, the same way we found the other one funny which you guys didn't

 

[kookaburra69]

* Australian bowlers shall bowl under arm.


That sounds about right

 

[sohum]

You forgot to add this one:

* Andrew Symonds must be given at least 4 lives in every innings, where these lives can be provided by the umpire in the event that the fielding team does not account for them.

 

[KBC]

- MEDIA RELEASE -
From the International Cricket Council
For immediate release (especially in India)

The ICC have announced several changes to the playing conditions for the forthcoming 3rd test in Perth between Australia and India. These changes include:
* India must win.
* The umpires shall be nominated by the Indian team. It will be acceptable if reserve Indian players rotate as umpires.

* During the game all appeals shall be referred to the Indian management team and the Indian media contingent prior to any decision being made. (This includes where an Indian player may appear to the naked eye to have been bowled.)

* When the Indian team is batting the boundary rope shall be moved inwards 20 metres.
* Australian bowlers shall bowl under arm.
* India must win.
* Any time Ricky Ponting is on the field he shall be restrained in a full length strait jacket and muzzled.
* Any Australian spin bowler must advise the batsman in advance what type of delivery is going to be bowled.
* At any time Andrew Symons is on the field he must where a gorilla suit and accept any sledging in the light hearted manner that this is intended.

* India must win.
* Harbhajan Singh will be cleared on appeal and be nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize.
* Indian batsman may be permitted to use larger bats.
* Australian batsmen may use a bat every fifth over.
* Australian fieldsman should praise every batting attempt by the Indians by saying "Good shot chaps." Apart from this Australian players are not permitted to speak.

* During the lunch and tea break both teams shall get together and have a cup of tea.
* India must win.

The ICC and the BCCI hope that all Australians will understand these minor changes are intended in the best interest of the game.

The ICC would also like to announce that Steve Bucknor has been appointed as the ICC's new cricketing ambassador to Kazikstan. The ICC wishes Steve all the best in this important, newly created role.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Now that's what you call funny.
Not all of it, but most of it.

Makes no sense. All Those Things happened to Australia in Sydney. It's India's turn now to get their money back.

 

[mattfb]

Makes no sense. All Those Things happened to Australia in Sydney. It's India's turn now to get their money back.

Read some of the other threads :

Then you will find out why this was made.

 

[evertonfan]

Hilarious. Stop whinging Saisrini, your hardly doing the reputation of some Indian supporters on here any favours with your bitterness.

The thing about that list is that in a few years time, it'll probably be true. India are such terrible losers.

 

[.::Stevo::.]

Hilarious. Stop whinging Saisrini, your hardly doing the reputation of some Indian supporters on here any favours with your bitterness.

The thing about that list is that in a few years time, it'll probably be true. India are such terrible losers.

*waits for insults*

 

[sohum]

*waits for insults*

Its the jokes forum so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt.

 

[King Pietersen]

I still dont find this particularly funny, but it's far, far funnier than the other similar tripe thats been posted here of late. I actually managed to find a smile when reading this one.