bharat
Panel of Selectors
- Joined
- Jun 20, 2001
- Profile Flag
- India
No offence.Just take it in the lighter sence.
After India's (esp., Dada's) pathetic performance in day 5 of Bangalore test, want for change in the top post (both actual and pseudo)has strengthened.
Now to top that Ganguly Jokes are on the loose. I have given a couple of'em below:
Variant 1: Phone call
India Pakistan Match has started. As to be expected, it's a charged up atmosphere and the heat is really on!
India is put in to bat. As to be expected, three wickets down, for a measly score.
There is phone call for Ganguly, at the Dressing Room. The Team Manager picks up the call.
Voice : "Hello ! I am Ganguly's friend speaking . Can I talk to him now ?"
Team Manager : "Sorry ! He has just gone in to bat . "
Voice : "No problem I'll hold"
Variant 2: How to cook noodles
Step 1: boil one cup of water
Step 2: as soon as Ganguly goes for batting, put the noodles in the
boiled water and add the tastemaker.
Step 3: stir till Ganguly is on the field.
Step 4: As soon as Ganguly is back in pavilion, your noodles are ready to eat.
Update: Looks like there are lot more, see them below the cut.
More Ganguly Jokes:
- Best Seller by Ganguly: Back to the Pavillion in 2 minutes
- Shoiab Akhtar admits Ganguly is faster and quicker than him.
"I haven't seen any one get out so fast. Man, I envy his speed.
I am quick but he is quickest.", he says.
"I think I should now cut my run up short when I bowl to him.
Or else, he might be gone when I am half way thru my run up."
- Narain Karthikeyan to get some tips on Speed from Ganguly.
His sponsorers have asked him to talk to the Prince of Kolkotta. T
hey are also planning to endorse Ganguly.
- Dinesh Karthick confesses that his skills in getting
ready and padded have improved a lot.
As soon as Ganguly goes to bat, I know there is very little time in getting ready.
"I must have broken world records a few times in this series" ,
says the Indian dimunitive wicketkeeper.
- Q: Any Guesses which is Ganguly's favorite movie?
A:Gone in 60 seconds.
- Railways keen on Ganguly: Atleast we'll be having someone who comes (back) before time.
This will help them improve the image with the Indian public.
- Q: Which was the hottest place in B'lore Chinnaswami Stadium for the past few days?
A: The seat Ganguly was sitting in while in the Pavillion.
- Ganguly to donate all his bats to charity.
"I don't require a bat nowadays", said the Indian southpaw.
- Dravid's latest comment on Ganguly: "In the pavillion, there's God,
and then there's Ganguly (always there)".
In Bangalore Test , Ganguly was given out , a decision with which he obviously disagreed.
He paced up and down outside the pavilion until the umpires came in.
'I wasn't out, you know,' he said to the umpire Billy Bowden .
'Oh no? Look in the paper tomorrow!' said Billy .
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sachin was out first ball. On the long walk back to the pavilion he had to pass the incoming
batsman Ganguly,
'Hard luck, man,' smirked Ganguly.
'Yes. It's a shame I had to be right in the middle of a hat trick,
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The nervous Ganguly was having a terrible time and was lucky to still be at the crease. During
a lull, he stammered to Kamran Akmal , 'Well, I expect you've seen worse players.'
Silence....
He said 'I said I expect you've seen worse players.'
'I heard you the first time. I was just trying to think.'
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ganguly had a large opinion of his batting prowess. He was approached by a KSCA member
who couldn't resist
saying to him,
'You know, whenever I watch you bat, I always wonder...'
'I know, I know. How I do it.'
'No. Why you do it.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ganguly had a dreadful test match which cost his side the game. All week long
he practiced hard for the next game. During the following match, he said to John Wright,
'Notice any difference?' John Wright looked at him thoughtfully. 'You've had your hair cut, haven't you?'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After India's (esp., Dada's) pathetic performance in day 5 of Bangalore test, want for change in the top post (both actual and pseudo)has strengthened.
Now to top that Ganguly Jokes are on the loose. I have given a couple of'em below:
Variant 1: Phone call
India Pakistan Match has started. As to be expected, it's a charged up atmosphere and the heat is really on!
India is put in to bat. As to be expected, three wickets down, for a measly score.
There is phone call for Ganguly, at the Dressing Room. The Team Manager picks up the call.
Voice : "Hello ! I am Ganguly's friend speaking . Can I talk to him now ?"
Team Manager : "Sorry ! He has just gone in to bat . "
Voice : "No problem I'll hold"
Variant 2: How to cook noodles
Step 1: boil one cup of water
Step 2: as soon as Ganguly goes for batting, put the noodles in the
boiled water and add the tastemaker.
Step 3: stir till Ganguly is on the field.
Step 4: As soon as Ganguly is back in pavilion, your noodles are ready to eat.
Update: Looks like there are lot more, see them below the cut.
More Ganguly Jokes:
- Best Seller by Ganguly: Back to the Pavillion in 2 minutes
- Shoiab Akhtar admits Ganguly is faster and quicker than him.
"I haven't seen any one get out so fast. Man, I envy his speed.
I am quick but he is quickest.", he says.
"I think I should now cut my run up short when I bowl to him.
Or else, he might be gone when I am half way thru my run up."
- Narain Karthikeyan to get some tips on Speed from Ganguly.
His sponsorers have asked him to talk to the Prince of Kolkotta. T
hey are also planning to endorse Ganguly.
- Dinesh Karthick confesses that his skills in getting
ready and padded have improved a lot.
As soon as Ganguly goes to bat, I know there is very little time in getting ready.
"I must have broken world records a few times in this series" ,
says the Indian dimunitive wicketkeeper.
- Q: Any Guesses which is Ganguly's favorite movie?
A:Gone in 60 seconds.
- Railways keen on Ganguly: Atleast we'll be having someone who comes (back) before time.
This will help them improve the image with the Indian public.
- Q: Which was the hottest place in B'lore Chinnaswami Stadium for the past few days?
A: The seat Ganguly was sitting in while in the Pavillion.
- Ganguly to donate all his bats to charity.
"I don't require a bat nowadays", said the Indian southpaw.
- Dravid's latest comment on Ganguly: "In the pavillion, there's God,
and then there's Ganguly (always there)".
In Bangalore Test , Ganguly was given out , a decision with which he obviously disagreed.
He paced up and down outside the pavilion until the umpires came in.
'I wasn't out, you know,' he said to the umpire Billy Bowden .
'Oh no? Look in the paper tomorrow!' said Billy .
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sachin was out first ball. On the long walk back to the pavilion he had to pass the incoming
batsman Ganguly,
'Hard luck, man,' smirked Ganguly.
'Yes. It's a shame I had to be right in the middle of a hat trick,
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The nervous Ganguly was having a terrible time and was lucky to still be at the crease. During
a lull, he stammered to Kamran Akmal , 'Well, I expect you've seen worse players.'
Silence....
He said 'I said I expect you've seen worse players.'
'I heard you the first time. I was just trying to think.'
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ganguly had a large opinion of his batting prowess. He was approached by a KSCA member
who couldn't resist
saying to him,
'You know, whenever I watch you bat, I always wonder...'
'I know, I know. How I do it.'
'No. Why you do it.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ganguly had a dreadful test match which cost his side the game. All week long
he practiced hard for the next game. During the following match, he said to John Wright,
'Notice any difference?' John Wright looked at him thoughtfully. 'You've had your hair cut, haven't you?'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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thats really funny
