The funny thread

[nikhilverma]

One day a female with a baby comes into the bus and the driver says that's the ugliest baby i have ever seen in my life. The woman angrily slams the fare into the fare box and occupies the last seat.

A gentleman sitting next to her asked her why was she upset and the lady told him the story and the gentleman said that the bus driver is a public servant and he has got no right to say these words.

The woman says that she should go and tell the driver to say sorry

And the gentleman says "Here let me hold your MONKEY"
: : : : : : : :

 

[squiz]

that one was funny :

 

[ricky123]

Originally posted by andrew_nixon79@Nov 26 2003, 01:33 PM
Well, it would appear that jokes about sardarji's are discrimanatory in nature. No one post them in future.

B) well jokes not all jokes about sardarjis r DISCRIMANTORY

and i am very very surprised ,who was the person who said that the jokes had any connection with sardarjis religion ,that is so very wrong.

i will tell u y people in indian mostly crack jokes on sardarjis .

cuz sardarjis r well know for their humour ,they very cheerfull in nature

and very comic at times ,they can make people laugh even at a funeral

they r the life line for comedy in india ,i had many sardarjis as friend all my life and i had a great time with them ,and i always cracked jokes on them but ,they never felt bad


i will tell u want makes sardarjis angry .

pl .dont try it ..... u may end up dead.... i got myself in trouble a lot of times ...

they dont like anyone making fun of thier hair and they dont like anyone commenting on thier turbun or pulling thier turban....

other then that they r jems .and very good friends ,they can give thier life to save urs.

thats why the indian millitary has so many sardars in it
and india is proud of them

sardars r also know to be very brave....

and pl.. dont mistake me for a sardarji ..i just know all this cuz i have spent many years with them.......


:

 

[ricky123]

B) RULES OF LIFE


Smart & Dumb
Smart man + smart woman
= Romance
Smart man + dumb woman
= Pregnancy
Dumb man + smart woman
= Affair
Dumb man + dumb woman
= Marriage
Smart boss + smart employee
= Profit
Smart boss + dumb employee
= Production
Dumb boss + smart employee
= Promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee
= Overtime

 

[ricky123]

B) Cricket
The two rival cricketers were talking. "The local team wants me to play for them very badly."
"Well, you're just the man for the job."

Child:"Good bowling!"
Father: Be silent.
Child:"Good owling!"

Bowler: HOWZAAAAAAAT?
Umpire: Not bad. Better luck next time.

The batsman had been out off the third ball and was back in the ###### taking an early lunch of fish and chips. 'I don't think much of this batter,' he complained. 'You should talk,' replied the waitress.

The insects were having their annual cricket match. The captain was a Grasshopper, who turned to the Cricket and said, "Are you a bowler?"
"Of course," said the Cricket. "Who ever heard of a cricket bat?"

The two club members were talking. "What were the statistical records of the team's tour?"
"Well, as far as we can remember-about 387 gallons of beer and 47 pubs."

The teacher had asked the class to write an essay on cricket. With only a few minutes left, one boy had written nothing. Suddenly, he looked up at the clock, grabbed his pen and scribbled something on the paper. The teacher read out his essay: "No play today. Rain."

The coach was talking to the young lady cricketer. "Now, you must remember to get behind the ball."
"But it's the same all the way round!"

 

[imported_fuser]

Well that's the power of Ten - Tendulkar !! So Beware !! :bow:

 

[imported_fuser]

Here's a good one guys. Pakistani President Musharaf wants a postage stamp issued with his
Picture on it. So, he instructs his people stressing that it should be of high International quality.
The stamps are created, printed and released. Musharaf is very pleased.
But within a few days of release of the stamp, he begins hearing
Complaints that the stamp is not sticking and he became infuriated.
He calls the people responsible and orders them to investigate the
matter.
They check the matter out at several post offices and they report the
problem to Musharaf .
The report states: "There is nothing wrong with the quality of the
stamp.
The problem is people are spitting on the wrong side.

 

[nikhilverma]

ha ha ha really funny i liked it
: : : :

A grand day out!

 

[nikhilverma]

do you have the nike smile

 

[nikhilverma]

Where's my car?

 

[nikhilverma]

the beer effect

 

[ricky123]

B) Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar
bowl's
empty and so is your head.

After you, my love, my only prize
Would be a bullet between my eyes
Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot
This describes everything you're not

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes --
mooo!, I'm good at telling lies!

Every time I see your face
I wish I were in outer space

I saw your face as you walked by
but then I saw a better guy

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life

Beauty is on the inside, but some may doubt,
If it's true, I'd prefer you inside out.

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime

I see your face when I am dreaming
That's why I always wake up screaming

My love you take my breath away
What have you stepped in to smell this way

My feelings for you no words can tell
Except for maybe "go to happy thoughts

 

[nikhilverma]

superb brilliant i just couldn't stop my laugh
: : : : : : : : : : : : :

 

[ricky123]

B) Cricket as explained to a foreigner....
You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side thats been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

 

[ricky123]

:huh: only in pakistan