The Jokes Thread
- Thread starter scorpion_rulezz
- Start date
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duffarama
Chairman of Selectors
Arn't I always funny Usy my bro yo, what's in the house shmo?usy said:Duffy If you think you're funny crack some Jokes on Wolrd Cup, remember they have to be funny...
blackleopard92
Panel of Selectors
If the Titanic was made in India
1) There would be 10 times as many people on the ship
2) There would be a song with Kate Winslet in a white saree and of course
singing in the rain!
3) The movie would be called "Pyar Kiya To Marna Kya"
4) Hero and Heroine would float in cold water for days and still survive, but the villian would die in the first dip.
5) The iceberg would be sent by the heroine's father to teach the hero a lesson.
6) None of the women would float due to heavy designer sarees.
And last but not least
7) Half of the rescue boats would be reserve for SC/ST/OBC
1) There would be 10 times as many people on the ship
2) There would be a song with Kate Winslet in a white saree and of course
singing in the rain!
3) The movie would be called "Pyar Kiya To Marna Kya"
4) Hero and Heroine would float in cold water for days and still survive, but the villian would die in the first dip.
5) The iceberg would be sent by the heroine's father to teach the hero a lesson.
6) None of the women would float due to heavy designer sarees.
And last but not least
7) Half of the rescue boats would be reserve for SC/ST/OBC
kamrandahir
Club Cricketer
Teenage drivers
Jennifer, a 16-year-old teenager, just got her learner's permit and went out for a drive with her parents. After a wild ride, they finally got back to the house.
Jennifer's parents staggered out of the car. Her her mother quietly murmered, "Thank you!"
"Sure!" her daughter replied. Any time, mom!"
"I wasn't talking to you," her mother replied. "I was talking to God!"
Jennifer, a 16-year-old teenager, just got her learner's permit and went out for a drive with her parents. After a wild ride, they finally got back to the house.
Jennifer's parents staggered out of the car. Her her mother quietly murmered, "Thank you!"
"Sure!" her daughter replied. Any time, mom!"
"I wasn't talking to you," her mother replied. "I was talking to God!"
The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said, "Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will."
"That is very kind of you," said the doctor emotionally, and then added, "Can I see that prescription I just gave you? I'd like to make a little change..."
"That is very kind of you," said the doctor emotionally, and then added, "Can I see that prescription I just gave you? I'd like to make a little change..."
nightprowler10
Executive member
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2004
- Location
- Madhouse on Madison
- Online Cricket Games Owned
- Don Bradman Cricket 14 - PS3
I didn't get that one.blackleopard92 said:
nightprowler10
Executive member
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2004
- Location
- Madhouse on Madison
- Online Cricket Games Owned
- Don Bradman Cricket 14 - PS3
kamrandahir
Club Cricketer
A Really Bad Day
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."
"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
An old man goes to the doctor for his yearly physical, his wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination room, he tells the old man, "I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample."
The old man, being hard of hearing, looks at his wife and yells: "WHAT?"
"What did he say? What's he want?"
His wife yells back, "He needs your underwear."
Bar Joke
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."
"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
Medical Joke
An old man goes to the doctor for his yearly physical, his wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination room, he tells the old man, "I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample."
The old man, being hard of hearing, looks at his wife and yells: "WHAT?"
"What did he say? What's he want?"
His wife yells back, "He needs your underwear."
kamrandahir
Club Cricketer
Stupid Fishermen
Two guys went on vacation and rented a boat and fished in the lake every day. One day they caught 25 fish.
One guy said to his friend, "Mark this spot so that we can come back here again tomorrow."
Next day, on the way to rent the boat, the same guy asked his friend, "Did you mark that spot?"
"Yep!" his friend replied, I put a big 'X' on the bottom of the boat."
"You idiot," said the first guy. "What if we don't get that same boat today?"
The millionaire
A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a millionaire."
"And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend.
The woman replied, "A multi-millionaire."
