Lockdown tournament (SEASON 2 - Updates in first post)

[wasteyouryouth]

Prince Jennings!
Prince Jennings!
Ridicule is nothing to be scared of.

 

[Dutch]

For everyone to sing along to: The Jennings National Anthem!

Jenningusalem

And did those feet in ancient time,
Walk upon England's creases green?
And was the bat with holes
In England's baffling line-up seen?

And did the countenance so dazed,
Shine forth from open mouth?
And was Jenningusalem bowled out here
Among this mediocre but too good for him bowling attack?

Bring me my paracetamol of burning throbbings!
Bring me my lip-balm of eternal bliss!
Bring me anything anything at all!
Bring me my taxi out of here!

I will not cease from mental fight,
Nor shall my sword sleep in my hand
Till we have got rid of Jenningusalem
From England's green but pleasant line-up!

 

[wasteyouryouth]

Main page



Match selection



This is what I'll share for team selections.

 

[wasteyouryouth]

I'm pleased to announce that after a refit to be able to host cricket; the final of the Social Distancing Shield will take place at The Rungrado 1st of May Stadium, Pyongyang. It will be the first major cricketing final held in DPRK and there is sure to be a very, very captive audience.



Virat Kohli and Alastair Cook visited and both agreed it was a stadium fit for a Dear Leader.

 

[ahmedleo414]

I am overjoyed! Long live The Batman... I mean Leader!

 

[beechcroft]

With the tournament nearly here, I wanted to find some inspirational words to say to my players. Well, I thought, there's no one more inspirational than the Very Stable Genius:

We're going to win. We're going to win so much. We're going to win so much, you're going to be so sick and tired of winning. You're going to come to me and go "please please, we can't win anymore. You'll say "please, we beg you, we don't want to win anymore. It's too much. It's not fair to everybody else. And I'm going to say "I'm sorry, but we're going to keep winning, winning, winning."

 

[ahmedleo414]

 

[Dutch]

Meanwhile at Dutch headquarters: pre-match team talk

Translation:

"FFS who forgot to inflate the Keaton Jennings mascot?
Was it you?
Sorry boss
You feckwit!
What do you think this is the effing Girls Scout Champions League?

Get stuck in to the sandwiches lads......cheese and pickle....peanut butter.....marmite....lots of ham....dont finger them all Cooky just take one FFS

I want to tell you about an emotional speech I once heard: its us against them, we have come to win, lets raise our will, our fight our fight...

It was a good speech but is totally lost on you you bunch of useless has beens....

Okay lets get out there and get this over with so that we can get home as soon as possible to watch re-runs of Friends"

 

[sonimrajk]

@wasteyouryouth

Hi,

Can you please place the match schedule and result sheet in the first post of this thread ?

 

[blockerdave]

I’ve gone more for the John Sitton “Bring your ******* dinner” approach.

 

[wasteyouryouth]

@wasteyouryouth

Hi,

Can you please place the match schedule and result sheet in the first post of this thread ?

Yeah, I will update that tomorrow. So it doesn't get lost amidst the Jennings jokes.

 

[Dutch]

Yeah, I will update that tomorrow. So it doesn't get lost amidst the Jennings jokes.

Get your priorities sorted mate!

Waste can you update the first page with an index and link to each Jennings Joke please?

 

[GuyIncognito]

I seriously wonder/hope if its possible to have the world record holder of 805* Kim Jong Un's face on the adboards.

 

[beechcroft]

I seriously wonder/hope if its possible to have the world record holder of 805* Kim Jong Un's face on the adboards.

He's the WG Grace of North Korea. It's not that he's as good as Grace was, it's that he'd undoubtedly say to the umpire, as Grace supposedly said when given out LBW, "they came to see me bat, not you umpire", and just keep on batting.

After the match, the umpire would mysteriously "retire". Never to be seen again. It's a funny ol' game.

 

[wasteyouryouth]

I seriously wonder/hope if its possible to have the world record holder of 805* Kim Jong Un's face on the adboards.

Like this?