The Jokes Thread

[pcfan123]

BBC NEWS | South Asia | Condoms 'too big' for Indian men

 

[iridescentt]

BBC NEWS | South Asia | Condoms 'too big' for Indian men

Majority of Indian males -- > 3 to 5 centimetres.

Epic rofl.

 

[shravi]

Majority of Indian males -- > 3 to 5 centimetres.

Epic rofl.

3-5cm SHORTER than most. Learn to read.

It doesn't matter, really. Our population shows that Indians get laid more often so yeah...

 

[pcfan123]

The population does not show how often they have sex just rather that they have it unprotected

 

[shravi]

"It's not size, it's what you do with it that matters," he said.

"From our population, the evidence is Indians are doing pretty well.

"With apologies to the poet Alexander Pope, you could say, for inches and centimetres, let fools contend."

This man disagrees and he knows more about this than you.

Either way, the article doesn't concern me so whatever.

 

[Prithvi]

A Sardar jee went to buy an umbrella.
He roamed for around half a kilometer.
When someone asked why was he roaming for half a kilometer, he replied," You people dunno how to buy an umbrella. Where ever I go, everyone is showing umbrella without holes. Without Holes, how can I see whether its raining or not??:laugh:laugh

 

[Prithvi]

Once there was a bus conductor, who was very rude to his passengers.One

day a young girl, tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus.

Unfortunately the young girl came under the bus and died on

the spot. Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station,who in

turn took him to the court.

The judge gave him capital punishment.

He was taken to the electrocution chamber. There was a single chair in

the center of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the

room.

The conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was

given

to him. But to everyone's amazement,

he survived. The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his

profession.

After a few months, this time, a middle aged woman tried to board the

bus but the conductor didn't stop the bus.Unfortunately, the

middle aged woman came under the bus and died on the spot.

Again angry passengers took him to the police station, who in turn took

him to the court. The judge took one look at the conductor and gave him

capital punishment. The Bus conductor was taken to the same electrocution

chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a

single

banana peel at one corner of the room. He was strapped to the chair and

high

voltage current was given to him. This time also to everyone's

amazement, he survived.

A couple of months later,

an elderly gentleman tried to board the bus. This time the Bus

conductor, remembering his earlier experiences, stopped the bus.

Unfortunately the

elderly gentleman slipped and died due to his injuries. The conductor

was then to the court, to the same judge. Though he hadn't done anything wrong, but considering his past record

the judge decided to set an example and gave him capital punishment.

The Bus conductor was again taken to the same electrocution chamber

where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a single

banana

peel at one corner of the room. He was strapped to the chair and high

voltage

current was given to him.

This time he died instantly !!!!!!!!!!!

..

...

...

...

..

..The question is why didn't he die on the first two occasions, but died

instantly the third time??

think hard

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

common ..............

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

tired ???....

ok........ there is the Answer............

During the first two times,

the conductor was a Bad Conductor,

therefore electricity didn't pass through him.

But during the third time, he was a good conductor ,

so electricity passed through him freely and he died!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Obviously you gotta revise your science chapter on

Electricity ???

OK, OK....Relax.....No violence please...courageous readers!

 

[yashwanth kumar]

Once there was a bus conductor, who was very rude to his passengers.One

day a young girl, tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus.

Unfortunately the young girl came under the bus and died on

the spot. Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station,who in

turn took him to the court.

The judge gave him capital punishment.

He was taken to the electrocution chamber. There was a single chair in

the center of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the

room.

The conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was

given

to him. But to everyone's amazement,

he survived. The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his

profession.

After a few months, this time, a middle aged woman tried to board the

bus but the conductor didn't stop the bus.Unfortunately, the

middle aged woman came under the bus and died on the spot.

Again angry passengers took him to the police station, who in turn took

him to the court. The judge took one look at the conductor and gave him

capital punishment. The Bus conductor was taken to the same electrocution

chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a

single

banana peel at one corner of the room. He was strapped to the chair and

high

voltage current was given to him. This time also to everyone's

amazement, he survived.

A couple of months later,

an elderly gentleman tried to board the bus. This time the Bus

conductor, remembering his earlier experiences, stopped the bus.

Unfortunately the

elderly gentleman slipped and died due to his injuries. The conductor

was then to the court, to the same judge. Though he hadn't done anything wrong, but considering his past record

the judge decided to set an example and gave him capital punishment.

The Bus conductor was again taken to the same electrocution chamber

where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a single

banana

peel at one corner of the room. He was strapped to the chair and high

voltage

current was given to him.

This time he died instantly !!!!!!!!!!!

..

...

...

...

..

..The question is why didn't he die on the first two occasions, but died

instantly the third time??

think hard

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

common ..............

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

tired ???....

ok........ there is the Answer............

During the first two times,

the conductor was a Bad Conductor,

therefore electricity didn't pass through him.

But during the third time, he was a good conductor ,

so electricity passed through him freely and he died!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Obviously you gotta revise your science chapter on

Electricity ???

OK, OK....Relax.....No violence please...courageous readers!

Loved a lot Science and excitement

 

[Biggy]

*All the nerds chuckle*

 

[Will_NA]

Once there was a bus conductor, who was very rude to his passengers.One

day a young girl, tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus.

Unfortunately the young girl came under the bus and died on

the spot. Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station,who in

turn took him to the court.

The judge gave him capital punishment.

He was taken to the electrocution chamber. There was a single chair in

the center of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the

room.

The conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was

given

to him. But to everyone's amazement,

he survived. The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his

profession.

After a few months, this time, a middle aged woman tried to board the

bus but the conductor didn't stop the bus.Unfortunately, the

middle aged woman came under the bus and died on the spot.

Again angry passengers took him to the police station, who in turn took

him to the court. The judge took one look at the conductor and gave him

capital punishment. The Bus conductor was taken to the same electrocution

chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a

single

banana peel at one corner of the room. He was strapped to the chair and

high

voltage current was given to him. This time also to everyone's

amazement, he survived.

A couple of months later,

an elderly gentleman tried to board the bus. This time the Bus

conductor, remembering his earlier experiences, stopped the bus.

Unfortunately the

elderly gentleman slipped and died due to his injuries. The conductor

was then to the court, to the same judge. Though he hadn't done anything wrong, but considering his past record

the judge decided to set an example and gave him capital punishment.

The Bus conductor was again taken to the same electrocution chamber

where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a single

banana

peel at one corner of the room. He was strapped to the chair and high

voltage

current was given to him.

This time he died instantly !!!!!!!!!!!

..

...

...

...

..

..The question is why didn't he die on the first two occasions, but died

instantly the third time??

think hard

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

common ..............

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

tired ???....

ok........ there is the Answer............

During the first two times,

the conductor was a Bad Conductor,

therefore electricity didn't pass through him.

But during the third time, he was a good conductor ,

so electricity passed through him freely and he died!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Obviously you gotta revise your science chapter on

Electricity ???

OK, OK....Relax.....No violence please...courageous readers!

Die.

 

[cnbd_novice]

Anon Bestman (newlywedsontjob) on Twitter

I had to post this somewhere.

 

[iridescentt]

Loved a lot Science and excitement

There goes a minute of my life I'm never going to get back.

 

[Ollie_H]

Anon Bestman (newlywedsontjob) on Twitter

I had to post this somewhere.

That is actually very funny!

 

[Cricketdude]

Just been to jb hi fi looking for the game grand theft auto. The sales assistant wanted me to describe it to her. I told her its about a black man driving around with an iron bar, crashing cars, rooting whores and evading police. The stupid bitch gave me tiger woods PGA tour 2010.

 

[OffCutters]

^ ROFLMAO! I cracked up Good stuff!