The Jokes Thread

[AkshayS]

haha@Binnuy and Pranav: lol quality ones.

 

[Varun]

Haha! Binnu, that was nice!

 

[Aditya]

Good jokes there by Pranav and Binnu. :laugh

 

[Meet]

Binnu, great one.Can't stop laughing.:laugh

 

[Prithvi]

Best Prank ever saw in my lifetime:

One of my friends called Dominos pizza.

Dominos Pizza Fella: Hello, Dominos pizza, Hyderabad.
My Friend: Can you kindly give me the phone number of Pizza Hut, thankyou.

:rtfl.

Heights of Insulting:​

Math Teacher: Children, in your days, I used to scored 100/100 in Mathematics.

Students: May be you might have had a good teacher.
:laugh

 

[Meet]

^:laugh

 

[Chetan0304]

5year old kinda jokes, not funny at all. good try though.

 

[P Squared]

This is 9th of september 2001,

Musharaff calls up Bush and says-Sorry to hear about the plane crash earlier this morning at 9.

Bush- But nothing happened here.

Musharaff- What time is it in USA?

Bush- 7am.

Musharaff- Okay I'll call you later.

 

[deathrevenge9]

:laugh
Loved it.

was that really funny Meet ?

 

[Meet]

Somehow.

 

[Themer]

I was in a porno cinema the other night. I hadn't been there five minutes when some guy started yelling at me: "Oh, you're a beast, you're despicable!"

So I said to him: "Listen mate, we're all here together, you're just as despicable as I am." But then other people started chipping in, shouting stuff like "How do you sleep at night?" and "You're a total disgrace."

Next thing I knew the manager was standing right beside me, throwing in his two pence worth as well. I remember what he said to the letter. He said: "In 25 years I've never seen anything like this."

So I said: "I know I'm not much to look at but that's a bit harsh, isn't it?" But he wasn't listening, he was just waving his arms saying he was going to "throw me out" and that security was "on its way."

At that point I just thought "Oh, I don't need this".

So I stood up and said: "fearsome tweak it, come on kids we're leaving."

 

[Dutch]

Not bad Themer, not bad.

Here is my paltry little effort for today:

A Catholic teenager goes to confession, and after confessing to an affair with a girl is told by the priest that he can?t be forgiven unless he reveals who the girl is. ?I promised not to tell!? he says. ?Was it Mary Patricia, the butcher?s daughter?? the preist asks. ?No, and I said I wouldn?t tell.? ?Was it Mary Elizabeth, the printer?s daughter?? ?No, and I still won?t tell!? ?Was it Mary Francis, the baker?s daughter?? ?No,? says the boy. ?Well, son,? says the priest, ?I have no choice but to excommunicate you for six months.? Outside, the boy?s friends ask what happened. ?Well,? he says, ?I got six months, but three good leads.?

 

[P Squared]

Someone please tell me 2 decent(no adult stuff) jokes. I need them tomorrow for school.

 

[blake]

5year old kinda jokes, not funny at all. good try though.

Chetan do good

 

[pcfan123]

My ex-girlfriend has a tattoo of a sea shell on her inner thigh, if you put your ear to it you can smell the ocean