The Jokes Thread

[***Wiljoy]

Lord Nelson ???

The Poms stood on the burning deck,
Cricket bats in their hands.
Like phoenix from the burning wreck,
Surveyed the sinking sands.

They rubbed their balls with open glee,
They talked of Waterloo.
Was it to be or not to be,
Could they escape the poo.

Flintoff's a ****** cried the crowd,
As Colly wobbled on.
The Jack was flying high and proud,
Blow up dolls, long foregone.................... :crying

 

[Karachi Xpress]

That wasnt funny Wil!

 

[duffarama]

That wasnt funny Wil!

Neither was post #648.

 

[Karachi Xpress]

It wasnt supposed to be funny

 

[Will_NA]

then why did you post in the Jokes thread! Ba-dum-dish

 

[Leicester Fox]

not sure if this has been done before but ah well, I'm not looking through 50 pages

why doesn't the queen wave with this hand?

becuase it's not hers :

comic genius

 

[Ponting22]

this is for the people who ever has watched wolf creak or knows of ivan milat.

Ivan Milat and a tourist where walking through the bush late at night and the backpacker said "god its scary in here"
Ivan Milat responded "your scared? i have to walk back by myself"

 

[Hooper]

not sure if this has been done before but ah well, I'm not looking through 50 pages

why doesn't the queen wave with this hand?

becuase it's not hers :

comic genius

I dont get it? Please explain!

 

[etho11]

Even im acting a bit slow on this one.

 

[Hooper]

Oh now I get it...How old are you Liecster?

 

[kuttakumar]

Not sure whether this has been posted before.

Why is the knowledge of a businessman less than that of a physicist?(Proof using Physics)

Power=Work/Time

Now, time is money

So replacing time by money,we get

Power=Work/Money

Again, Knowledge is Power

So replacing Power by Knowledge, we get

Knowledge=Work/Money

So,
For constant work, as Money tends to infinity knowledge tends to zero and as Knowledge tends to infinity, Money tends to zero.

Thus,
A businessman owns more money than a physicist.So the former's knowledge is less than the later(assuming both does equal work) .

 

[Will_NA]

What the hell!!!????

 

[afreedee]

Not sure whether this has been posted before.

Why is the knowledge of a businessman less than that of a physicist?(Proof using Physics)

Power=Work/Time

Now, time is money

So replacing time by money,we get

Power=Work/Money

Again, Knowledge is Power

So replacing Power by Knowledge, we get

Knowledge=Work/Money

So,
For constant work, as Money tends to infinity knowledge tends to zero and as Knowledge tends to infinity, Money tends to zero.

Thus,
A businessman owns more money than a physicist.So the former's knowledge is less than the later(assuming both does equal work) .

whats that in english?

 

[Karachi Xpress]

There was a couple married for quite some time and they had a boy of 5-6 years old. The relationship between the couple was turning sour.

So finally it reached such a stage that they thought it was better for them to be divorced than carry on such a relationship.

So they consulted a lawyer. But the big question was who would have the kid. In the hearing in the court it was decided that this choice should be left on the kid. So the judge asked "Son, would you like to stay with your mummy?"

Kid said,"No, mummy beats me" ( so the judge asked "Then, would you like to stay with your papa then?" Kid said, "No, papa beats me" ( Now the judge was in a dilemma and was not able to decide what to do... after pondering for some time he smiled with the ideas he had in his mind about the child......


And he gave the judgment that the kid would stay with......




Any guesses????? ???




































Come on I know you can make it......


































Ok here goes the answer












The kid would stay with the Indian Cricket Team(no offense) because





THEY NEVER BEAT ANYBODY!

 

[prarara]

/\hahaha That's a classic Indian Cricket and losing! Who'dathunkit?