The Jokes Thread

[ZoraxDoom]

Slightly offensive jokes here, so please mind:

Q) What's the difference between a Pizza and a [Insert type of people you hate, like Chavs or Aussies or etc.]
Ans) A Pizza can feed a family, but a [Type of people] can't.

Q) What's similar between Batman and [Insert type of people you hate]
Ans) They both can't live without Robin!!

I heard both in school. Quite funny, albeit a tad offensive

 

[siddharth2002]

Not sure whether this has been posted before.

Why is the knowledge of a businessman less than that of a physicist?(Proof using Physics)

Power=Work/Time

Now, time is money

So replacing time by money,we get

Power=Work/Money

Again, Knowledge is Power

So replacing Power by Knowledge, we get

Knowledge=Work/Money

So,
For constant work, as Money tends to infinity knowledge tends to zero and as Knowledge tends to infinity, Money tends to zero.

Thus,
A businessman owns more money than a physicist.So the former's knowledge is less than the later(assuming both does equal work) .

Lol, its mathematical but hard to make everyone laugh

 

[Will_NA]

Slightly offensive jokes here, so please mind:

Q) What's the difference between a Pizza and a [Insert type of people you hate, like Chavs or Aussies or etc.]
Ans) A Pizza can feed a family, but a [Type of people] can't.

Q) What's similar between Batman and [Insert type of people you hate]
Ans) They both can't live without Robin!!

I heard both in school. Quite funny, albeit a tad offensive

lol. those were good ones

 

[Jaztheman]

Q) What's the difference between a Pizza and a Scouse
Ans) A Pizza can feed a family, but a Scouse can't.

Q) What's similar between Batman and Scouse
Ans) They both can't live without Robin!!

my answers, but i am a sexy scouser.

 

[Benauds appreci]

ouch

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch".

It was an iron bar.

 

[Karachi Xpress]

TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
PAPPU : "HIJKLMNO ! "!!

TEACHER : What are you talking about?
PAPPU : Yesterday you said it's H to O !


************ *****

TEACHER : PAPPU, go to the map and find North America.
PAPPU : Here it is!

TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS : PAPPU!


************ *****


TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell "crocodile"?
PAPPU : "K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L"

TEACHER : No, that's wrong
PAPPU : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!


************ *****


TEACHER : PAPPU, give me a sentence starting with "I".
PAPPU : I is...

TEACHER : No, PAPPU. Always say, "I am."
PAPPU : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

 

[siddharth2002]

Good ones Karachi.

 

[Will_NA]

lol, brill

 

[Karachi Xpress]

Sum more...

TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of " COINCIDENCE?"

PAPPU : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."


************ *****


TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"

PAPPU : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"


************ *****


PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?


************ *****

TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots !

PAPPU: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.


************ *****

TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?

PAPPU: No sir, I don't have to , my mom is a good cook.


************ *****


TEACHER : PAPPU, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as yourbrother' s. Did you copy his ?

PAPPU: No, teacher, it's the same dog !


************ ****

TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

PAPPU: A teacher

 

[Kshitiz_Indian]

Lol KX cool hahahaha

 

[siddharth2002]

TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"

PAPPU : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"

Loved it.

 

[afreedee]

Haha - those are really good. The last one is just so true...

 

[BigCrickNan]

What have the championship and cordless drill got in common?

No Leeds.

 

[DJ Ager]

An English school teacher explains to her class that she is an england fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are england fans. Everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl. The teacher looks at the girl with surprise and says, "Janie, why didn't you raise your hand?" "Because I'm not an engalnd fan," she replied. The teacher, still shocked, asked, "Well, if you are not a england fan, then who are you a fan of?" "I am a wales fan, and proud of it," Janie replied. The teacher could not believe her ears. "Janie, why pray tell are you a wales fan?" "Because my mum is a wales fan, and my dad is a wales fan, so I'm a wales fan too!" "Well," said the teacher in an obviously annoyed tone, "that is no reason for you to be a wales fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mom were a moron and your dad were a moron, what would you be then?" "Then," Janie smiled, "I'd be an engalnd fan."

young boy approached his grandmother one day and he said to her: "Grandma, I don't want to live at home any more. My mother beats me and my father beats me."
"Well," said his grandmother, "who do you want to live with?"
The boy replied: "I want to live with the english football team."
"Why is that?" his grandmother asked. "Because they don't beat anybody"

 

[siddharth2002]

The first one is true lol. :laugh