The Jokes Thread
- Thread starter scorpion_rulezz
- Start date
handsome
International Coach
- Joined
- May 22, 2004
- Location
- New Bombay
- Online Cricket Games Owned
- Don Bradman Cricket 14 - Steam PC
Thanks for the reply dalek , i'll try and improve my humour.
What do you mean your humour
. I have read them on a couple of other Indian sites.
Leicester Fox
Chairman of Selectors
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2006
- Online Cricket Games Owned
dunno if its been done but: how long does it take a scouser to have a (insert word beginning with s ending in t 
) ?
9 months
Heres a better one:
A young school teacher starts her first ever class in Islington. Feeling nervous, she tries to get the children on her side by stating Arsenal as her football team. She then asks the kids to raise their hand if they also support Arsenal.
Every child raises their hand, apart from a small girl sitting in the back row. The teacher asks the young girl who she supports.
"Tottenham", the girl replies.
"Why?, When you live so close to the Arsenal?" the teacher asks again.
"Well my dad supports Spurs, my mum supports Spurs, and my grandad supports Spurs", the girl explains.
"Well, thats no good. What if your mum was a prostitute, your dad was a drug-dealer, and your grandad was a murderer. What would you do then?" says the teacher trying to impress the rest of the class.
"Thats easy", says the girl calmly.
"Then I would be a Liverpool fan".
) ? 9 months
Heres a better one:
A young school teacher starts her first ever class in Islington. Feeling nervous, she tries to get the children on her side by stating Arsenal as her football team. She then asks the kids to raise their hand if they also support Arsenal.
Every child raises their hand, apart from a small girl sitting in the back row. The teacher asks the young girl who she supports.
"Tottenham", the girl replies.
"Why?, When you live so close to the Arsenal?" the teacher asks again.
"Well my dad supports Spurs, my mum supports Spurs, and my grandad supports Spurs", the girl explains.
"Well, thats no good. What if your mum was a prostitute, your dad was a drug-dealer, and your grandad was a murderer. What would you do then?" says the teacher trying to impress the rest of the class.
"Thats easy", says the girl calmly.
"Then I would be a Liverpool fan".
Last edited:
Master Khan
National Board President
ok...?
D
Deleted member 13648
Guest
A man walks into a bar with a bear, they order a few drinks and stay in the bar for a few hours. When the man gets up to leave the bar-tender calls out to him, "You gonna leave that lying there?" The man replied by saying,
"It's not a lion, it's a bear."
"It's not a lion, it's a bear."
D
Deleted member 9102
Guest
Edit: Chris Gayle
D
Deleted member 13648
Guest
HUNGRYLION
School Cricketer
- Joined
- May 21, 2007
- Online Cricket Games Owned
1.Sherlock Holmes and Matthew Watson were on a camping and hiking trip.
They had gone to bed and were lying there looking up at the sky. Holmes said, "Watson, look up. What do you see?
"Well, I see thousands of stars."
"And what does that mean to you?"
"Well, I guess it means we will have another nice day tomorrow. What does it mean to you, Holmes?"
"To me, it means someone has stolen our tent."
2. A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her *husband*!"
3. Coming home from his Little League game, Billy swung open the front door very excited. Unable to attend the game, his father immediately wanted to know what happened. "So, how did you do son?" he asked.
"You'll never believe it!" Billy said. "I was responsible for the winning run!"
"Really? How'd you do that?"
"I dropped the ball."
IF ANYBODY LIKES THIS POST I BEG FROM HIM TO GAIN ME A REPUTATION POINT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
They had gone to bed and were lying there looking up at the sky. Holmes said, "Watson, look up. What do you see?
"Well, I see thousands of stars."
"And what does that mean to you?"
"Well, I guess it means we will have another nice day tomorrow. What does it mean to you, Holmes?"
"To me, it means someone has stolen our tent."
2. A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her *husband*!"
3. Coming home from his Little League game, Billy swung open the front door very excited. Unable to attend the game, his father immediately wanted to know what happened. "So, how did you do son?" he asked.
"You'll never believe it!" Billy said. "I was responsible for the winning run!"
"Really? How'd you do that?"
"I dropped the ball."
IF ANYBODY LIKES THIS POST I BEG FROM HIM TO GAIN ME A REPUTATION POINT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
Last edited:
HUNGRYLION
School Cricketer
- Joined
- May 21, 2007
- Online Cricket Games Owned
Here is another joke. Frankly speaking this is my own
Once there lived three friends -somebody, nobody and mad. One day somebody and nobody had a quarrel and then somebody killed nobody. Just then Mad was passing by and he appeared to be the only witness of the murder. Mad quickly rang the police from his cellphone.
Officer: Hello
Mad: Officer please come quick somebody has killed nobody.
Officer: What nonsense are you talking about? Are you mad?
Mad: Yes
Once there lived three friends -somebody, nobody and mad. One day somebody and nobody had a quarrel and then somebody killed nobody. Just then Mad was passing by and he appeared to be the only witness of the murder. Mad quickly rang the police from his cellphone.
Officer: Hello
Mad: Officer please come quick somebody has killed nobody.
Officer: What nonsense are you talking about? Are you mad?
Mad: Yes
Last edited:
