smssia0112
Chairman of Selectors
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2005
Tassie's stories are always entertaining for two reasons; one is his great commentary, and the other is his terrible playing.
Story Celebrity Cricket Survivor [C2007] Famous XI 6/233 off 15 (chasing 271)
- Thread starter tassietiger
- Start date
tassietiger
International Cricketer
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2005
- Online Cricket Games Owned
The Famous XI, shellshocked as one would expect after being belted for 13.55 per over, had one factor spurring them on to come out fighting after the break. Denny Crane is still undefeated. And there’s no way a bunch of no-hoper celebrities-come-cricketers are going to wreck that for him. Also the iPod guy claimed he was racially abused, as someone called him black.
The iPod guy, in an understandably angry state, was the wrong person to bowl a short ball to first up. After hooking the first ball away for six, there was no going back for him, smashing the opposition bowlers in every direction imaginable off the first over to end up with the team on 0/28, the iPod guy with four 6s and two 2s. Doctor Emmett Brown at the non-strikers end had no choice but to watch and utter “Great Scott!” repeatedly, as the iPod guy had no intentions of sharing the strike.
You did not need to be a rocket scientist to figure out that all that was needed by the Famous XI was to give the iPod guy as much strike as possible. But the Famous XI had this covered anyway, due to their non-striker being a rocket scientist. The first ball was driven to long off for a single, and the iPod guy was again given the strike. He continued his swashbuckling ways, while humming Eye of the Tiger to himself as it was playing on his iPod. The team raced along to 0/41 off 2 overs, with the iPod guy having scored 40 of them.
Doc faced all of the third over, giving the crowd an idea of what he was made of. It wasn’t much. He only managed one four and one six, and the four was a very conveniently placed edge due to a mis-cued on drive. It is becoming increasingly clear that the Doc isn’t required to play much of a scoring role at the moment, and he should leave most of the batting to the iPod guy. The Famous XI ended the over still in a more than reasonable position, 0/51 off 3 overs.
The iPod guy regained his strike this over and didn’t waste it, bringing up his 50 off 14 balls during it with a massive six into the leg side stands. This innings meant so much not only to the iPod guy, but also society. It wasn’t just a stand against racial abuse in sport, as that message has been spoken often enough. It was a clear message that has been more and more obvious as time goes by – black people are better than white people at sport. The iPod guy’s over took the team to 0/70 off 4 overs, with the iPod guy on 59 and Doc on 11.
The iPod guy, still clearly angry about the racial abuse that he copped while fielding, showed no signs of slowing in the next over. Except for the fact he only hit one six. And he gave Doc a fair bit of the strike. But the Famous XI still managed to score at a reasonable enough rate to get the required run rate down to 12.27 an over, as they rocketed along to 0/88. With Jesus Christ, Denny Crane, Bill Gates and God still to bat, the Famous XI are looking very ominous.
Consider yourself banned from reading this thread. I don't want you here any more. If anyone else thinks it is funny to tease me about my Cricket 2007-playing abilities, expect the same punishment.
The iPod guy, in an understandably angry state, was the wrong person to bowl a short ball to first up. After hooking the first ball away for six, there was no going back for him, smashing the opposition bowlers in every direction imaginable off the first over to end up with the team on 0/28, the iPod guy with four 6s and two 2s. Doctor Emmett Brown at the non-strikers end had no choice but to watch and utter “Great Scott!” repeatedly, as the iPod guy had no intentions of sharing the strike.
You did not need to be a rocket scientist to figure out that all that was needed by the Famous XI was to give the iPod guy as much strike as possible. But the Famous XI had this covered anyway, due to their non-striker being a rocket scientist. The first ball was driven to long off for a single, and the iPod guy was again given the strike. He continued his swashbuckling ways, while humming Eye of the Tiger to himself as it was playing on his iPod. The team raced along to 0/41 off 2 overs, with the iPod guy having scored 40 of them.
Doc faced all of the third over, giving the crowd an idea of what he was made of. It wasn’t much. He only managed one four and one six, and the four was a very conveniently placed edge due to a mis-cued on drive. It is becoming increasingly clear that the Doc isn’t required to play much of a scoring role at the moment, and he should leave most of the batting to the iPod guy. The Famous XI ended the over still in a more than reasonable position, 0/51 off 3 overs.
The iPod guy regained his strike this over and didn’t waste it, bringing up his 50 off 14 balls during it with a massive six into the leg side stands. This innings meant so much not only to the iPod guy, but also society. It wasn’t just a stand against racial abuse in sport, as that message has been spoken often enough. It was a clear message that has been more and more obvious as time goes by – black people are better than white people at sport. The iPod guy’s over took the team to 0/70 off 4 overs, with the iPod guy on 59 and Doc on 11.
The iPod guy, still clearly angry about the racial abuse that he copped while fielding, showed no signs of slowing in the next over. Except for the fact he only hit one six. And he gave Doc a fair bit of the strike. But the Famous XI still managed to score at a reasonable enough rate to get the required run rate down to 12.27 an over, as they rocketed along to 0/88. With Jesus Christ, Denny Crane, Bill Gates and God still to bat, the Famous XI are looking very ominous.
Consider yourself banned from reading this thread. I don't want you here any more. If anyone else thinks it is funny to tease me about my Cricket 2007-playing abilities, expect the same punishment.
Last edited:
w3lshrugby
Panel of Selectors
Tassie I think your Cricket 07 playing abilities are marvellous 
tassietiger
International Cricketer
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2005
- Online Cricket Games Owned
Then you may stay.Tassie I think your Cricket 07 playing abilities are marvellous
Highlander999
ICC President
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2006
- Location
- London
Yeah... they are marvellous 
:
:
Karachi Xpress
Chairman of Selectors
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2005
- Location
- Canada
This is an awesme story. :rtfl
tassietiger
International Cricketer
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2005
- Online Cricket Games Owned
The 6th over provided few major events, following the trend of the others. Doc Emmett Brown bats like a snail, gets the iPod guy on strike, who smashes a couple of sixes before the over is finished. The highlight would?ve been the return of the mystery urinator, who decided to expand on his earlier efforts and attempt to urinate while showing his equipment to a whole stand of the crowd. How he is yet to be caught by security is beyond belief. The Famous XI move on to 0/111 off 6 overs with the iPod guy on 84*
The 7th over provided the West Indies with the breakthrough they sorely wanted. Unfortunately for them it was the slow-scoring Doc Emmett Brown who holed out, a mis-cued lofted on drive going straight to midwicket. Doc left with a respectable 29, but had thrown the Famous XI?s confident run chase into disarray. In times of trouble like these, you need a saviour. Luckily the Famous XI had one in the Messiah, the son of God, Mary?s kid, the King of the Jews, the Chosen One, Jesus. Unluckily for the Famous XI, Jesus tried to flick a ball off his pads in the air straight to a fieldsman, a ploy which is rarely met with success. Jesus? second-ball duck brought Denny Crane to the crease, who scored a deft two before the end of this catastrophic over came.
In the 8th over, the iPod guy showed the world that not only does he have some big shots in his arsenal, but he also has extremely large testicles. Despite his team falling apart around him and all hope being seemingly resting on his shoulders (or the shoulders of his bat, or the middle of his bat maybe as not many runs are scored off the shoulders of the bat) he chose to hit two monstrous sixes to start off the over anyway. He then rotated the strike to Denny Crane, a man notorious for living big. He hit two sixes over midwicket before deciding to try out a cut shot, only to register a rare dot in the scoresheet. The Famous XI moved on to 2/141 off 8 overs.
In the 9th over, things went from reasonably okay to worse in the space of one ball. The iPod guy, clearly a nervous wreck, being on 97* in his first international class twenty20 match of his career, decided to take a quick single. The wicketkeeper appealed, but they made it. Denny Crane decided to do the same thing, thinking if someone else can run a quick single, Denny Crane most certainly can. What he didn?t realise was that the iPod man is an unfit hack who wouldn?t be able to run even if he was a nose. The iPod man was run out for 98, a shattering moment for any debutant, and the decision was not reversed despite Denny Crane?s strong defence that he gave the umpire. ?Your Honour, I?m Denny Crane. Let him stay. Lock and load.? The matter was further controversialised (for want of a realer word) by the fact that the wicketkeeper actually made no contact with the stumps with his hands or the ball. On close inspection, at the time the bails came off the stumps, the closest part of his body to the stumps was probably his knee. After this footage was picked up, Osama promptly added Dinesh Ramdin to his list. Bill Gates came in and hit a four to take the Famous XI to 3/146 off 9 overs.
In the 10th over it was proved that Denny Crane was unfazed by running out the iPod guy for 98. He pummelled the bowling for 32 runs off the over, taking his personal score to 46. He even had the audacity to throw in a cheeky reverse sweep which gave him two runs. Bill Gates at the non-striker?s end was left bored stupid, but he has so much money I strongly recommend that nobody starts to feel sorry for him at all. This mammoth over took the Famous XI to 3/178 off 10 overs, needing 94 to win off the last 10 overs. (at a required run rate of 9.4 an over, which I worked out in my head, believe it or not)
The 7th over provided the West Indies with the breakthrough they sorely wanted. Unfortunately for them it was the slow-scoring Doc Emmett Brown who holed out, a mis-cued lofted on drive going straight to midwicket. Doc left with a respectable 29, but had thrown the Famous XI?s confident run chase into disarray. In times of trouble like these, you need a saviour. Luckily the Famous XI had one in the Messiah, the son of God, Mary?s kid, the King of the Jews, the Chosen One, Jesus. Unluckily for the Famous XI, Jesus tried to flick a ball off his pads in the air straight to a fieldsman, a ploy which is rarely met with success. Jesus? second-ball duck brought Denny Crane to the crease, who scored a deft two before the end of this catastrophic over came.
In the 8th over, the iPod guy showed the world that not only does he have some big shots in his arsenal, but he also has extremely large testicles. Despite his team falling apart around him and all hope being seemingly resting on his shoulders (or the shoulders of his bat, or the middle of his bat maybe as not many runs are scored off the shoulders of the bat) he chose to hit two monstrous sixes to start off the over anyway. He then rotated the strike to Denny Crane, a man notorious for living big. He hit two sixes over midwicket before deciding to try out a cut shot, only to register a rare dot in the scoresheet. The Famous XI moved on to 2/141 off 8 overs.
In the 9th over, things went from reasonably okay to worse in the space of one ball. The iPod guy, clearly a nervous wreck, being on 97* in his first international class twenty20 match of his career, decided to take a quick single. The wicketkeeper appealed, but they made it. Denny Crane decided to do the same thing, thinking if someone else can run a quick single, Denny Crane most certainly can. What he didn?t realise was that the iPod man is an unfit hack who wouldn?t be able to run even if he was a nose. The iPod man was run out for 98, a shattering moment for any debutant, and the decision was not reversed despite Denny Crane?s strong defence that he gave the umpire. ?Your Honour, I?m Denny Crane. Let him stay. Lock and load.? The matter was further controversialised (for want of a realer word) by the fact that the wicketkeeper actually made no contact with the stumps with his hands or the ball. On close inspection, at the time the bails came off the stumps, the closest part of his body to the stumps was probably his knee. After this footage was picked up, Osama promptly added Dinesh Ramdin to his list. Bill Gates came in and hit a four to take the Famous XI to 3/146 off 9 overs.
In the 10th over it was proved that Denny Crane was unfazed by running out the iPod guy for 98. He pummelled the bowling for 32 runs off the over, taking his personal score to 46. He even had the audacity to throw in a cheeky reverse sweep which gave him two runs. Bill Gates at the non-striker?s end was left bored stupid, but he has so much money I strongly recommend that nobody starts to feel sorry for him at all. This mammoth over took the Famous XI to 3/178 off 10 overs, needing 94 to win off the last 10 overs. (at a required run rate of 9.4 an over, which I worked out in my head, believe it or not)
Karachi Xpress
Chairman of Selectors
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2005
- Location
- Canada
How did you calculate the required run rate in your head
You play very bad. I could do better
Anyway...Great story. Looks like an easy win for FXI.
You play very bad. I could do betterAnyway...Great story. Looks like an easy win for FXI.
mattfb
Chairman of Selectors
This story is class! I told you iPod Guy would be better than Jesus.
Geez, I didn't expect you to bat so good.
Geez, I didn't expect you to bat so good.
Left_Hander
Chairman of Selectors
- Joined
- Apr 25, 2006
- Online Cricket Games Owned
Great batting. I didn't the West Indies would bowl so bad, or a you just a good batter. (I doubt that) You might actually win
tassietiger
International Cricketer
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2005
- Online Cricket Games Owned
Just to clear this up, I bat more often than I bowl in cricket games.
Highlander999
ICC President
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2006
- Location
- London
Your so clever working out that run-rate 
Seeing the way you bat I think you can easily make that total. Great story mate. Adds a lot of humour to us boring old story makers
Seeing the way you bat I think you can easily make that total. Great story mate. Adds a lot of humour to us boring old story makers
Similar threads
- Poll
